How I Fell In Love

For every love story, may it end as it would, the beginning is always sweet. I virtually didn’t sleep the previous night, so, I woke up feeling like a skedonk. The weather in Jos in the early morning of August 2009, has this way of tying your feet to the hinges of your bed when it’s raining.

I had started building up a premise for the discussion I would start with Carolyn later today. She’s a sexy single mother with hips that hung like the wings of a plane. Maybe that’s how Adamawa State ladies are; with swollen backsides and a beautiful voice. I got an invitation to come see her today. She requested to see me so I obliged. Besides, she a single parent. And i thought i could use her for good practice before i find a comely woman. And yes, there is a mutual understanding of the fact that we both do like each other. Except for my secondary denial turned into primary acceptance now.

In my unrehearsed mien I appeared in front of her door as it stood wide open with a pull from her right hand. I got a warm welcome from her and her daughter, Mimi- aged one and a half. Rosey, her kid sister didn’t fail to inspirate my cologne with her elaborate smile and an unusually weird raised eyebrow.

Discussions ensued amidst her explanations of the iconic models which were a mighty lot, but a fulcrum that pillared her comportment. Believe me, each time I looked at her, the best and the least moral image that confronts me is jiggery-pokery. And she a pastor’s child who just turned 18. And her kid was 1 and a half, like uno mas…!

Everything went smooth until her baby father came in. Prior to este momento, I doctored my premise to a fresher substitute: I told her that I was relocating finally to Lagos because I was done with what I got to do in Jos. She became moody and literally said ‘I hate you!’ The kind that sounded like ‘I love you!’. I guess the strategy worked with the alienation effect.

When her “baby father” entered the house, they molly-coddled and almost pecked. Did I cringe? Hello!!? Of course I did! How was I going to sit in there and cope with this open confrontation? This was his domicile. I was the stranger. With a withdrawn handshake and plastic smile I forced out a ‘good morning’. The best way to assume comfort and restore comportment, don’t you think? She was edgy and fretful; and I was cool with that. If I was her baby father, I’d notice from when I entered. I probably would have said an ‘are you okay, sweetheart’? But believe me, her man did not notice; at least not immediately, because she played it well from his angle. At that moment, I was beside myself with an excitement that never lasted.

I pretended to be engrossed in my conversation with Rose. I hope you do remember her? She’s the skinny-looking, lengthy-eyebrow-wearing, no-swollen-backside girl. While in that divided mind state, I peeked at Carolyn as she did me with her knowing smile. But whatever it was like, it ended “smoothly” because I got to leave earlier than I was supposed to despite her mute disapproval and desiring body language.

Mimi jumped on me as I enthusiastically picked her up, assuming the position of the ‘baby father’. I had told Jeff (the “baby father”) bye already and was outside with Carolyn by my right, Mimi on me and Rose by my left. “Please don’t leave on Friday. Can’t you wait until I return from the outreach?”, she said to me. I got a mild erection that didn’t gain outright visibility. For a moment I had a temporary ladder that took me beyond sky-scrapper level.

I was mum though when she told me not to call her again if i was to travel. I obliged and agreed not to pick her calls or even send her a text. She took a few steps and told me to call her later, but I had already submitted my resignation.

That night, I replayed the exercise to myself again. I savored the promise of a happy ending and a possible delayed beginning. But whatever happens, I knew it won’t be long before we got in bed. That’s all i wanted. That’s all i ever wanted. But the drama with the butterflies made it difficult to differentiate lust from lost and lust from love.


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