Random (III)

mirage

as a kid. I was a loner.
too shy to speak. timid.
scared to be seen. I was
told I walked like a robot
so I always counted my
steps and arm swings.
until I became what they
called me. a walking robot.

the right school.
the right teacher.
and I could speak.
without shivering.
and i could walk
without shaking.
learnt to be Abdul.

now. I can’t go back.
to that trauma. where
I’d see the truth and
call it by a name it
doesn’t bear. to lick ass.
to bend over to be spanked.
to call a cow ‘big brother’
because of my love for beef.
I’m not interested in Ceaser’s.
what is mine will come to me.

Tomide Abdul